The Storms Ahead

Life is full of surprises. Nothing is ever as we expect, and nothing is almost always as we suspect. Everything changes and very few things, if any, ever remains the same. How we cope or adjust to changing situations or uncertainties pretty much serves as a good measure of how our resolve stands up to the challenge called Life. We have our own storms to weather and our own crosses to bear but the most important and justifying factor above all else is the HOW; how me maintain sole control of our own ship even if the sails go awry.

I once knew a friend who had it bad in every which way possible. Everything he ever tried to do almost always goes wrong. He never saw himself as a failure or that he amounted to nothing, rather he saw himself as having a bad set of directions or road maps to life. In other words, he saw the whole experience as a learning curve. He saw it as a chance to rethink strategies over and, perhaps, gain new sets of guidelines or principles. Where is this friend of mine from my college days now? Well, he holds an MD, PhD now. If you are in the circle of medical research and the medical field in general, you probably know the weight of those two titles following a person's name. How did he do it? I had the good fortune of running into him back in 2004 and over a cup of coffee from our favorite brew shop he said to me, " Jowel, I can't even remember how many times I failed but I remember how many times I got up to try again."

That got me thinking then, and although I had no mind of trying to delve into his answer deeper, I had a notion of where he was aiming at. Now its 2013 and here we are, still trying to get ahead, still trying to make any unwasted effort count. The question that's been burning in the back of my head isn't about the HOW anymore. It's more of the WHERE now. The question of HOW we managed all this time and eventually HOW we got here is now irrelevant. A more important question that we should ask ourselves is, "WHERE is HERE exactly?". Are we where we should be, ought to be, or supposed to be?

Nobody can really answer that in the fullest sense, or at least in the sense where it should make some sense. Our notion of time and precedence is dictated by our priorities and needs in life. We don't really take the time to worry about nonsensical stuff in the midst of the flurry of everyday living. Well, let me ask you this? How many times have you felt that something is indeed lacking in your life, that your bowl is never really full, and that the answer always eludes you on what that key ingredient is to finally complete you. Does it revolve around a  certain relationship with a cornerstone figure in your life? Is it about finances? Is it about outlook in general? IT can be a lot of things, really, but the common factor is that you LACK or cannot GRASP it.

The problem boils down to this fact- there is an inherent feeling or need that we harbor which simply dictates to us or tells us that we have to BE IN CONTROL of most, if not all, aspects regarding our lives. I mean let's face it, with control comes a sense of security which affords us a solid stand on just about anything. When we are in control we have an explanation when something goes awry or amiss. With control comes a level of confidence which enables us to take command of any situation and turn it around to our advantage.

What about having FAITH in something other than our abilities? DO we simply confine ourselves to our beliefs and sense of understanding and be polarized from a larger, much wider world view? What happens when we lose control? How will we manage then when nothing goes our way? The storms ahead can get worse when we fail to deal with situations which leave us unhinged. The solution, my friends, is a rather simple one. Simple in the sense that it deals with how we define or, in some instances, how we re-define what our priorities are. It is, however, difficult in the sense that most, if not all of us, have the inherent difficulty of accepting what the situation really is, as it presents itself. Rather, denial and diversion is the mode by which we deal with crisis and problems in our lives.

So, the next several posts will deal with key issues to help you get back on top, be in command and yet have an open mind. Being the captain of your own ship depends on many things and we often omit our faith in the weather. Having a steadfast resolve requires patience, the humility to admit what needs changing and what is inherently lacking, and the courage to strive and forge ahead.